Cracking the Shell

It's my second night here and my parents are long gone. My roommate arrived a few hours after I did. He is from Connecticut and came here by himself. I was a little surpirsed that he came all the way here on his own. He seems far more assertve about things than I am. I helped him move his stuff in and we talked about what we wanted to do this year. I told him that I really didn't know what to expect and that I wasn't all that good at making new friends. I have known the same people my entire life and now I would have to find a new group of friends. Luckily we had that in common. He suggested to me (which was his plan also) that I should find things here that remind me of home. Things that would make me more comfortable being here.

The more he talks the more I feel myself closing up. As much as I am actually interested in what he is saying, I'd really just rather be home. There would be no thinking about it if I was there. But I can't show him that, so I continue to look interested and engaged.

I'm not sure when what he said actually started to sick in (or if I just gave in so he would stop talking about it) but I told him that I would look into some of the stuff available on campus after classes got started. Although he was happy to hear me say that, he was more interested in what I would be doing to fill my void NOW. I told him nothing, to which he responded "you're not sitting in here, that's for sure!". After much prodding I eventually agreed to go with him to the main campus to see what was there. Apparently he wasn't happy being on the quiet, secluded engineering campus. I think having someone to do things with will make for a easier transition to being away from home. Next stop: College Ave.

Throughout Caleb's college career, I can anticipate him facing issues that will challenge both his moral and religious integrity. There will be moments of triumph and disaster, but all will be steps toward Caleb developing into an indepedent and self-sufficient member of the Rutgers community. His roommate is slowly becoming his big "A" authority regarding navigating the Rutgers campus. Whether or not this will be a compliment or detriment to his development is to be decided.